Where: The Neptune Inn, 10 Victoria Terrace, Hove
I paid: £3.30 for a pint of Harvey's
Quality, down to earth boozer if you ask me. Complete shithole, if you ask Rich Francis. The Neptune is probably always going to divide opinion depending on personal taste. It certainly doesn't look like much, situated in the middle of a scruffy row of shops directly across the road from the smarter Sussex pub. The ongoing work on the buildings exterior doesn't help as the pubs sign is almost completely obscured. Any passing prospective punters could be forgiven for thinking the place was abandoned, if it wasn't for the furtive smokers huddled outside letting their dogs piss on the scaffolding.
Most of the pubs regulars match their surroundings in that both have probably seen better days. Worn and weather-beaten, they could've come straight from a Seasick Steve lookalike competition, and that's just the women. They're all unfailingly friendly though, in the manner of people who've been in there all day and have no plans to be anywhere else in a hurry. Dogs are positively encouraged and it all makes for a nice, relaxed atmosphere. Despite its reputation as a blues pub the barmaid played an eclectic mix of music behind the bar and the entertainment for the evening was watching a Seasick Steve-alike busting a few moves to Rod Stewart's butchering of 'This ole heart of mine'. The walls are covered with posters for previous gigs as well as photos of musicians who have supposedly at one time or another appeared at the pub. Gary Moore I can believe but I have a hard time imagining that Eric Clapton or David Bowie have ever graced the Neptune 'stage'. Regular live music is a staple of the pub though and can attract an enthusiastic audience in the intimate surroundings.
I was originally only going to stop for a quick pint but before I knew it a couple of hours had passed (2 pints then!). I would've stayed for longer but the stairs down to the toilets represent quite a precipitous challenge after a few pints. It's just the sort of place I like though, relaxed and friendly. I'd be quite happy if the majority continue to view it as a dump because then it will remain relatively undiscovered and I can continue to enjoy it in peace. I might even start to work on that Seasick Steve beard.
Dog Friendly: Very Food: None advertised.
Outside seating: None. Scaffolding at the front of the building doubles as a dogs toilet, the alley at the side doubles as a humans one.
Entertainment: No pool table, dartboard or fruit machine. Small flatscreen TV showing only terrestrial television, no Sky.
Live music: Virtually every night of the week, geared towards blues and jazz. Always free.
OVERALL SCORE: 8.8/10..........I like it, I want to retire here.
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