I beg your pardon, I never promised you a Hoegaarden. No.8 The Albion Inn

When: 30 January 2012
Where: The Albion Inn, 28 Albion Hill, Brighton.
I paid: £3.50 for a pint of London Pride, innit?

The Albion Inn, Brighton. Not to be confused with The Albion Inn, Hove or indeed, The Albion Inn, Islington. Yet to visit the Hove offering but hopefully they're both better than this place. Situated halfway up Albion Hill, it's sandwiched between muesli friendly Hanover and the less salubrious tower blocks of the Ashton Rise estate. Unfortunately, I have first hand knowledge of the high-rise grubbiness because I used to work here. The only enjoyment coming from seeing how quickly I could pelt down the 12 storeys whilst delivering (the record being 4 mins 36 seconds, Thornsdale, June 2007....no misdeliveries that day then!) Oh what fun I had....

  The pub itself could probably do with a good scrub as well. There are two bars but both are sparsely furnished with a few tables and wooden flooring throughout. There are plenty of pictures adorning the walls, some are of relevant Brighton scenes but most are just a jumble that seem to have been put up to hide the faded decor more than anything. What should have been a big selling point for me is that there is a dartboard and electronic scoreboard in each bar. Indeed, if anywhere could be described as a 'darts' pub then this is it. The fixture list on the wall confirms that the pub currently has three teams playing in various Brighton leagues and a rickety trophy cabinet on the wall displays the silverware that they've won. Possibly the teams must be less than successful as the trophies bring to mind those handed out to the nerdy kid on school sports day just for turning up (I've still got mine somewhere).

For the non darts fan (God help you) there is also a bar billiards table but this has been carelessly shoved against a wall so that only a contortionist would be able to play properly. Ultimately the pub suffers from its location, it will live and die with its regulars as there are plenty of other decent drinking establishments in the immediate vicinity that all offer something more. I did briefly consider hanging around for the quiz at 9 P.M but unfortunately the barmaid chose this time to put 'Country Musics Greatest Plaintive Warbling, Volume II' on the jukebox and Hank Williams drove me out in to the cold January air.

Dog friendly: Yup                 Food: No menus in sight and I wouldn't eat in there anyway.

Outside seating: Small enclosed courtyard at the rear, mainly for smokers. Or stand outside on Albion Hill looking like a 'proper 'ard geezer' (even the women)

Entertainment: TWO dartboards!, bar billiards, fruit machine and a jukebox offering an impressive choice of songs. Probably the pubs only saving grace.

Quiz: Every Monday, 9 PM           Live Music: Rob Tate 5th February, apparently. (can't wait!)

OVERALL SCORE: Albion, Albion, Albion, Albion, Albion, Albioooooon, Albion, Albion, Albion, Albion, ALBION!! Meh......4/10

Seems to me you live your life like Piddle In The Wind. No.7 The Setting Sun

When: January 30th 2012
Where: The Setting Sun, 1 Windmill Street, Brighton
I paid: £3.30 for a pint of Piddle In the Wind

At the top of Carlton Hill on the fringes of the 'trendy' Hanover area stands The Setting Sun. As I'm the postman for the pub once a week I was hoping to scrounge a free pint but the friendly Aussie barman showed no signs of recognition and I was forced to stump up like a regular punter. I opted for a pint of the interestingly named 'Piddle In The Wind', which received a hearty endoresement from the barman. "If you like your stout mate you'll love that, it's got a great earthy taste". I just nodded and grinned, a standard reaction that's my mantra for life. Just nod and grin. If 'earthy' is another term for 'rank', then he was spot on. Maybe it's an acquired taste?

One of the big selling points of the pub are the sweeping views across the rooftops to the sea and even Worthing in the distance. Fantastic on a summers day, they are fetching even in the gathering gloom of a late January afternoon as the streetlights start to come on. There is a small enclosed patio area at the rear of the pub with seating and a comfortable extension should you wish to sit inside. The lighting is subdued with plenty of candles and the music played tends towards the dreary 'ambient' style but it's pitched at a level that is unobtrusive. With no pool table or TV's, it's perhaps not a pub for a lads night but more somewhere you'd stop for a quiet pint on the way home or maybe bring a date. (so I won't be going back in a hurry)

The food menu is extensive and competitively priced but £5.25 seems a wee bit ambitious for dessert. I was tempted by the Monday special of 'burger and a pint' for £6.50 but in the end just settled for another pint of the earthy stuff in the vain hope it would grow on me. Quiet when I arrived, the pub had started to fill up a bit and chatting to another punter whilst being served it somehow transpired that we were both in training for the marathon. This led to a challenge from the barman that neither of us could run down to the bottom of Carlton Hill and back to the pub inside 5 minutes.........Even with a pint of stout inside me I fancied my chances at this but Aussie boy then moved the goalposts to 4 minutes and the bet was off. (probably just as well as no prize had been discussed and quite apart from that I'd have looked bloody stupid). It's an idea to consider for the summer though. 'The Setting Sun challenge', with the fastest times going up on a wall of fame. Just as long as the prize isn't a pint of Piddle In The Wind eh?


Dog friendly: Nope                          Games: No pool table, dartboard, TV or jukebox. Not that kind of pub.

Outdoor seating: Patio area at rear and a couple of tables at the front     Quiz: Every 2nd Sunday

Live music: No                       Food: Large menu, freshly cooked and competitively priced.

OVERALL SCORE: 7/10 It's a view to a hill.